dorothy's caught in the hurricane

nice title hey?

 i can see you drowning.
and i don't know how to save you. i don't know what to do other than being around and not dumping my problems on you (huge fail there) and making you smile. even that isn't right. i don't know. sorry.

you make the people you care about feel exceptional. i don't know if you realise, but you do and it's such a gift.
such a gift.

i'm really angry, actually.




how dare you, just how dare you think you can say shit like that about her and it won't have any impact.
if you really love her like you say you do, you'll do your best to understand and get by like the rest of us.
and you'll make some allowances and understand that she's doing the best she can. we all are. sure it's frustrating and upsetting and it can make you mad; but why would you take it out on her? she's no more in control than the rest of us. that's the whole issue.
maybe its just your stupid boy way to freak out by lashing out, but you have to be more careful. she's so precious and if you understood you'd realise how fragile happiness can be.
why would you do something to ruin it intentionally like that? you should pay attention to what she says and realise that your anger isn't going to fix her. it doesn't work llike that. it's not going to snap her out of it when you go about it like this, it's just being mean and petty.
nobody likes being unhappy, it doesn't make people happy. if it did they wouldn't be...unhappy.
hypocritical as it may be for me to judge you for judging her so harshly, i don't care.
 i swear to god, if she breaks i will never forgive you all for being so stubbornly convinced of your righteousness.
i don't even know you and i'm judging you. for that, i'm sorry. i have nothing against you, but i disapprove so very very much.

-in here there was a whole paragraph of everything about you, but actually i don't want to post it here. it's not right, i still can't phrase it right. you're just...i can't even. don't start me. i love you so much, is all-

i love the rain. the past 2 days have been heavenly, despite the cold. it should rain like that all the time.

je t'adore

so fourth day of casual and i'm already bored. on a positive note my pants are amazing today. i might take a photo one day. unfortunatelement (franglais :) ) i have lost my ATM card so i'm to all intents and purposes totally broke at the moment.

grrrr....

it is either:

• at nadia's
• at my local coles
• at nicoles
• on public transport somewhere
• in my room.

please be in my room!
splendour in the grass looks INCREDIBLE this year and i cannot go. Like totally legendary. The Strokes, The Pixies, Florence and the Machine, Hot Chip...to name but a few.
NOT FAIR. NOT HAPPY JAN.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. "emo is over, you can all go home now"

also MGMT have released a new album. I haven't actually listened to it but hopefully it should be good. ish. maybe. I don't think I particularly care either way, but if its INCREDIBUBBLE you shall all hear my rantings

You. Me. My pants. Now

This is all

ignore this post unless you want your brain to fall out

so i met the love of my life today.
he's 10.
yeah.....

so awesome back to school yes and we're off to a flying start with a SAC already! i should be studying. urghhhh

not trying to make myself seem really pathetic; but i don't understand how my mind works at all. i can fall in and out of lust at the drop of a hat and its getting beyond ridiculous. i want something defined and proper....something that makes me feel like i might die.

yeah i'm cool

i'm out. homework beckons


EDIT/ just so we're clear; my falling-in-lust thing is totally unrelated to the 10 year old. he's cute, but i generally go for post-pubescent.

:(

sorry for the lack of updates this past week but

1. i was away and omgabfiugbaogabneibginh ugn  i love train travel. we flew to darwin on monday morning, saw crocodiles, were  amazed by the force of the storms, ate lovely food and then got on the ghan which runs from darwin down through central australia to adelaide. it was super awesome fun oh my goodness; and hilarity ensued when we watched the very effeminate very camp 'hospitality manager' subtlely chasing the young hot blonde french chef around the train. trains are narrow, y'know? which means one way traffic. which MEANS some awkward collisions occurred where hot french man mumbled 'excuse-moi' and kept walking while hospitality manager called after him.
   there were alot of old people - apparently its a retirement type trip. who would have known? not my parents obviously!
2. and this is the most important reason and the part where i stop being witty and amusing (yeah right...)
   the worst thing i could possibly have thought of has happened. if you recall this post from a few weeks ago; the girl I was talking about is a good friend of mine who was the creator and moderator of the blog linked there.She has handed it over to another girl called Charlotte who is going to do an amazing job. Unfortunately Chelle, the creator had to give it up because *braces self* she was suffering from Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia and been fighting it for some years. On the morning of March 24; her 24th birthday Michelle lost her fight due to an infection contracted the previous day. She passed away peacefully in her sleep with her parents with her. I am so upset; distressed is an understatement. This girl is one of the strongest and most inspirational people I have ever had the privelige of knowing; I just wish I had got to know her sooner. I can't stop thinking about all the things she could have done - the guy she was in love with who will never know she loved him. So yeah, I needed some time to calm down and I have done that. I'll be posting again now but probably less frequently for a while. And I won't stop promoting this  until my fingers drop off.

clothesies

printed singlet style dress with ruffle down the front. available in blue, red or floral. $220 from Joveeba.


I'm so jealous of anyone with money right now. I'm trying so hard to scrape together enough money to buy soup mix for lunch, and someone is going to buy this dress. Waaaaaah :(   

I found it on the estile website. I want to cry; even reduced to $99 by ny friends over there I still can't afford it. One day